Its been a busy week. Tuesday, I had some contractions that hurt my belly even after they'd ended. Add to that some random nausea and I spent the next two days in bed. Today I went in for my monthly apt with the MFM specialist. Evangeline is doing well. She still shows no hydro. I did not have the pleasure of seeing her feet move because she was taking a rare break. After the contractions started on Tuesday, she went WILD, protesting the constrictions on her space and she clearly needs to have a quiet day today to recoup! But I am not concerned about her reduction of wiggliness. She has turned head down and I feel her feet tickling the top of my tummy often so I am confident they function at the moment. What
IS a bit concerning is the fact that we saw her lesion for the first time clearly. Before it looked to me like random open shapes in bone. Now we can see the sac bulging out and the place where the skin/flesh is missing. I didn't care for that. Not a bit. I mean, in my head, I knew it was there, but I will confess that I laughingly keep hoping that each time, it will just randomly disappear. Maybe I was hit hard because I pictured it as smaller or not as wide. Whatever the reason, I found myself suddenly worried for her in a way that I haven't been in months.
Also, we could see the location more clearly and it is apparent that the defect is lumbar-sacral not just sacral. So we're back to the possibilities of greater difficulties in walking. The final "change" this week is a change in delivery date. We were looking at 39 weeks. Now they want to do an amnio at 37 weeks to see if her lungs are functioning. If they are they will deliver as soon as the week of August 22nd.
I put all this info together on my drive home and reminded myself of some important facts that haven't changed. 1) God is still in charge and it doesn't matter to Him where her lesion is, he will still be her God and take care of her. 2) She is still my pretty baby whom I love. 3) We still have fantastic support all around us. 4) I can be thankful that at least I know ahead of time that my baby will need surgery etc. and so I'm not totally blindsided.
Even though her face is blurred by the umbilical cord laying just beneath her nose, I can see she has her daddy's chin and jawline. I am happy to meet her no matter when and can't wait to hold her.
The best laid plans!
ReplyDeleteI remember when they changed my delivery date from the Mon to the Fri before (on the Wed!)
I'm glad the contractions eased off.
You have time now to prepare yourself to see her back when she's born, instead of picturing something different and being surprised.
Good Luck - not long now!
Lisa, Thank you for update...Im cheering you all on~You are an amazingly strong, smart, brave, adventurous, lovely Lady and I'm sure your little angel will be just like you! ~You and BJ are going to be the most amazing parents!!!~Lots of Love, best of wishes, and prayers for her safe arrival~ <3 Bev
ReplyDeleteMadi is about an L2, so pretty high. When I look at her, though, I don't see a level. All I see is an amazing blessing from God. Sometimes she crawls, sometimes she walks (with HKFOs), sometimes she zooms, but in everything she does, she does it with joy. She lights up our lives. Your little girl will light up yours too. I promise. It will all be wonderful.
ReplyDeleteThanks everybody!!! I know that it doesn't really matter what the scans all say cause they have been flip flopping from the beginning. :) It only matters that she's mine and she's gonna b here sooner rather than later! :) I really do appreciate the supportive words, encouragement and cheering!
ReplyDeleteI will pray for you as you await this blessed event. God is able to do more than we can even imagine. He loves your Evangeline even more than you do She is in the safaest place in the world - in His arms. Bless each of you
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